Albert König, "Arbeit," woodcut (via Wikimedia Commons)

Albert König, “Arbeit,” woodcut (via Wikimedia Commons)

Aquarius (January 21–February 19)

Maurizio Cattelan’s functional gold toilet “America” (2016) was just another of his pristinely fabricated practical jokes, until Guggenheim curator Nancy Spector gave it geopolitical gravitas. Something you did recently, Aquarius — perhaps with playfully innocent motives, perhaps with darker intentions — is about to get blown out of proportion, so prepare to be thrust into the spotlight.

Pisces (February 20–March 20)

We’re going to be blunt, Pisces: this month is going to be very challenging, but you’ll be in much better spirits if you have an emotional support animal at your side. But — and this is where it gets complicated — you will also be traveling a great deal this month (whether for a residency, an out-of-town exhibition, a research trip, or a loathsome art fair, we can’t say for sure), so please make sure your power pet is airline-compliant — unlike artist Ventiko’s emotional support peacock, Dexter.

Aries (March 21–April 20)

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Aries, but “LOVE” is in the eye of Robert Indiana. This may explain the romantic difficulties you’ve been having of late, but fear not: Philadelphia’s version of Indiana’s iconic Pop art sculpture is about to be repainted according to its original specs, and immediately thereafter your love life will get much more colorful.

Taurus (April 21–May 21)

The old riddle asks: “What’s black and white and red all over?” But print is dead and a more compelling version of that question is: What’s black and white and blue all over?” The answer, Taurus, is Pace Gallery’s new show of Louise Nevelson’s black and white assemblage sculptures from the 1950s through the ’80s exhibited, according to her own preference, under dim, blue lights. Your life will be seem quite blue this month, but there’s sadly very little you can do except embrace it.

Gemini (May 22–June 21)

Everyone needs a Mona Lisa, Gemini. Obviously we don’t mean that literally, but the saga of “Salvator Mundi” and the revelation that the Louvre Abu Dhabi essentially shelled out $450.3 million to have its own star Leonardo da Vinci attraction crystalizes a difficult but incontrovertible truth of contemporary existence: we may all ultimately only be known by one distinguishing feature, so it’s worth honing, crafting, and defining that feature to be as exceptional as possible.

Cancer (June 22–July 22)

They say you shouldn’t look a gift horse in the mouth, but what about a gift bouquet of giant, stainless steel balloon tulips that look like anuses with stems? Like the city of Paris pondering a public sculpture from Jeff Koons, you, Cancer, will be the recipient of a dubious and doubly problematic gift this month, and we encourage you to be very thorough, critical, and conscientious in your deliberations before you decide to accept or reject it.

Leo (July 23–August 22)

Every seemingly antiquated technology that was trendy in the 1970s and ’80s is making a comeback, and while many are fixated on the visceral power of virtual reality, we sense an impending explosion of laser art. Rita McBride’s dazzling and delightful new installation at the Dia Art Foundation’s space in Chelsea has us hoping for a laser art renaissance. Whatever bygone trend you’d like to revive, Leo, now is the time.

Virgo (August 23–September 23)

On a scale of one to ten, how excited are you to see Kehinde Wiley and Amy Sherald’s portraits of Barack and Michelle Obama? Sorry Virgo, whatever your answer was, it is insufficient, as this marks a more momentous shift in US presidential portraiture than we’ve ever witnessed. Now stay alert, as you, too, will have an opportunity to dramatically and meaningfully break from tradition this month.

Libra (September 24–October 23)

The quickest way into a Yayoi Kusama Infinity Room installation isn’t to wait in line at your nearest blockbuster museum show — it’s probably much simpler to travel to Dallas, Phoenix, or Pittsburgh. At worst, you could just make your own cardboard facsimile. You’ll be tempted to choose the easiest options this month, Libra, even if they involve waiting around, but remember that often a more indirect journey will not only get you to your destination quicker but provide more adventures along the way.

Scorpio (October 24–November 22)

We heard a few years ago that, for artists, Brussels was the new Berlin. This fact was confirmed, a couple of years later, by the inevitable T Magazine trend piece. But what’s the new Brussels, Scorpio? And what happened to whatever city Berlin had supplanted — what was the New Berlin before Berlin? We ask because there’s a lot of travel in your astrological forecast, and some of it may not simply be for work or vacation. If you’ve been thinking of changing cities and scenes, now is the time.

Sagittarius (November 23–December 21)

The Bayeux Tapestry is traveling outside of France for the first time in nearly a millennium, isn’t that great? Oh, but wait, it may be too fragile to travel and this whole scheme could end in disaster. What is more important, Sagittarius: preserving this priceless and enormous historic embroidery, or making good on a gesture of trans-Chanel solidarity between France and the UK? You needn’t answer this question decisively — although clearly they should just leave it be, right?! — but know that this month you’ll be called upon to settle a dispute and it’s of utmost importance that you be completely confident in your decision.

Capricorn (December 22–January 20)

We’re all for questioning the orthodoxy and prompting difficult questions, Capricorn. But opening minds and sparking inquisitive thinking requires a lot of thought on the provocateur’s part, too. You’ll have a chance to enlighten your loved ones this month, so make sure you don’t squander the opportunity by pulling a dumb stunt like the Manchester Art Gallery.

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This week, a Keith Haring drawing from his bedroom, reflecting on Theresa Hak Kyung Cha, you’re not descended from Vikings, the death of cursive, and more

The Editors

The Editors divide their time between Kinshasa, Brno, Goa, and Tikrit. They are fabulous and they will always be at the party you weren't invited to.