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# Crimes of the Art
- URL: https://hyperallergic.com/crimes-of-the-art-76/
- Published: 2016-08-30T18:50:56.000Z
- Updated: 2025-11-24T15:46:18.000Z
- Description: On this week’s art crime blotter: the makers of a Millennium Falcon–shaped shed struck back, a thief attempted to hold a sculpture ransom, and a painting of a nude man with a teapot set local prudes boiling.
- Author: Benjamin Sutton
- Tags: News, Art Crime, Censorship, Crimes of the Art, Star Wars, Vandalism, #wp, #wp-post, #image-position-hidden, #Import 2025-11-24 07:17 (2016, 2017, part 1)

![Stonebridge City Farms volunteers with their Millennium Falcon-shaped shed (screenshot by the author via Facebook)](https://storage.ghost.io/c/51/f8/51f871d8-b6be-4a73-b958-0ca4fff0110a/content/images/hyperallergic-newspack-s3-amazonaws-com/uploads/2016/08/crimes-art-millennium-falcon-shed.jpg)

Stonebridge City Farms volunteers with their Millennium Falcon-shaped shed (screenshot by the author via Facebook)

[*Crimes of the Art*](http://hyperallergic.com/tag/crimes-of-the-art/) *is a weekly survey of artless criminals’ cultural misdeeds. Crimes are rated on a highly subjective scale from one “Scream” emoji — the equivalent of a vandal tagging the exterior of a local history museum in a remote part of the US — to five “Scream” emojis — the equivalent of the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum heist.*

## Vandals Strike Back at Millennium Falcon Farm Shed

![crimes-of-the-art-scream-2](https://storage.ghost.io/c/51/f8/51f871d8-b6be-4a73-b958-0ca4fff0110a/content/images/hyperallergic-newspack-s3-amazonaws-com/uploads/2015/02/crimes-of-the-art-scream-2.jpg)

A shed in the shape of the iconic *Star Wars* vessel the Millennium Falcon that had become a popular attraction at Nottingham’s Stonebridge City Farm was [damaged](http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-nottinghamshire-37188422?ref=hyperallergic.com) by vandals. Happily, the company that gifted the shed to the farm has [offered](http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-nottinghamshire-37201429?ref=hyperallergic.com) to come make emergency repairs, offering the Falcon a new hope — the shed is currently competing in the countrywide [Shed of the Year](http://www.readersheds.co.uk/share.cfm?SHARESHED=5725&ref=hyperallergic.com) contest.

**Verdict:** These vandals have clearly gone over to the dark side.

## Nude Self-Portrait Not Everyone’s Cup of Tea

![crimes-of-the-art-scream-3](https://storage.ghost.io/c/51/f8/51f871d8-b6be-4a73-b958-0ca4fff0110a/content/images/hyperallergic-newspack-s3-amazonaws-com/uploads/2015/02/crimes-of-the-art-scream-3.jpg)

Artist Dennis McIntyre’s nude self-portrait painting, which features a strategically placed teapot — in keeping with the theme of the same gallery’s [*2016 New England Teapot Show*](http://gleninnesartgallery.com/index.php/news/2016-new-england-teapot-show-15-august-to-2-september?ref=hyperallergic.com) — spawned enough complaints that the local police visited the Australian art space and demanded that the work be relocated to a less prominent location. Despite the uproar, one gallery volunteer told the [*Glenn Innes Examiner*](http://www.bordermail.com.au/story/4129159/storm-in-teacup-over-self-portrait/?cs=2452&ref=hyperallergic.com) that a group of elderly women who’d recently visited loved McIntyre’s piece. “Their only complaint was that they couldn’t lift the teapot to see what was behind it,” the volunteer said.

**Verdict:** It seems excessive to involve the police in such a minor brew-haha.

## Stolen Sculpture Saved in Ransom Sting

![crimes-of-the-art-scream-1](https://storage.ghost.io/c/51/f8/51f871d8-b6be-4a73-b958-0ca4fff0110a/content/images/hyperallergic-newspack-s3-amazonaws-com/uploads/2015/02/crimes-of-the-art-scream-1.jpg)

A sculpture of a female figure holding a globe by artist [Ben Juniper](http://www.juniperart.com/?ref=hyperallergic.com) — valued at AUD65,000 (\~USD49,000) — was stolen from Caro Stewart’s front yard in the Peppermint Grove neighborhood of Perth, Western Australia. After the sculpture’s disappearance, Stewart found a note in her mailbox from the alleged thief offering to return the sculpture for a ransom, but when the 28-year-old suspect turned up at Stewart’s home to collect, he was arrested. He’s being [charged](https://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/wa/a/32388690/stolen-65-000-sculpture-recovered-after-alleged-ransom-attempt/?ref=hyperallergic.com#page1) with “taking reward for recovery of property obtained by means of indictable offenses.”

**Verdict:** Everybody knows the ransom exchange should happen on neutral territory — has this amateur criminal never seen [*The Big Lebowski*](https://youtu.be/7iTT8tIVTkE?ref=hyperallergic.com)?!