Opinion

Make Any Document Dumber With This Font Based on Trump’s Handwriting

Trump’s oversized script recently made an appearance during his ongoing saga with Ambassador Sondland. It has now been transformed into “Tiny Hands,” a new font available for free download.

Do you have the best words? Then you need the best font, Tiny Hand by Mark Davis. (All images courtesy Mark Davis)

As impeachment rears its head, we’re all hoping the writing is on the wall for Donald Trump, but last week the nation was temporarily diverted by the writing on his notepad. Donald Trump’s stupid handwriting, last the subject of ridicule in 2017 when he took an excessively long time to sign his first executive order, has since taken a backseat to the many other stupid things about him. But his oversized, childish script recently made an appearance as he attempted to rebut some incriminating testimony by Ambassador to the European Union Gordon Sondland in the House Intelligence Committee’s impeachment inquiry hearings.

Some internet pundits — including the professionally hilarious Patton Oswalt — observed that the President’s basic-ass talking points were lyrical, triggering a spate of fantastic musical send-ups in the style of Morrisey, the Ramones, and every emo band ever. But many chose to focus on the truly odd proportions (and perhaps sinister implications) of the handwriting itself.

Luckily enough for anyone hoping to make their writing look dumber, designer Mark Davis has adapted the President’s cartoonish handwriting into a custom font for Buzzfeed, dubbed Tiny Hand, which is available for free download. The font was originally created for a fake Trump memo in a satirical piece on Buzzfeed, and then Deputy Art Director Ben King went back to the well for some in-depth handwriting analysis in a second article.

One of a number of handwritten notes by the President, upon which Davis based his font design.

“Trump’s notes, written to friends and enemies alike, were almost always written at an angle, scrawled on top of printouts of articles from the internet,” wrote King. “I was struck not only by the peculiar delivery of the notes, but also by the idiosyncratic way Trump writes the alphabet. At that moment it was clear to me — as it surely must be to you, dear reader — I had to make a font based on Donald Trump’s handwriting.”

The task fell to Davis, who “cranked it out in about two days,” according to a statement on the Tiny Hand portfolio on his website. That is incidentally the same amount of time the President spent learning to read and write.

“Nice Sharpie” by Mark Davis. Use Tiny Hand, when you have stupid, racist things to say!

“Trump’s handwriting is unusual,” said Davis, in an email interview with Hyperallergic. “He has a quite distinctive and unusual hand, I would almost relate it to the lettering we would associate with Walt Disney’s signature. Some might even call it comical in its own right.”

So download, and proudly make stupid banners, mock up stupid holiday cards, or best of all, send letters to Republican congresspeople, urging them to remove Trump from office using Trump’s own stupid block script as a motivator.

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