Astrological Aesthetics: July 2015 Horoscopes
Hyperallergic’s horoscopes offer astrological advice for artists and art types, in art terms, every month.
Hyperallergic’s horoscopes offer astrological advice for artists and art types, in art terms, every month.
Cancer (June 22–July 22)
It may seem like everything is going your way this month Cancer, because it is, but heed the lesson of the Delaware Art Museum: just because an opportunity falls in your lap doesn’t mean you should take it. The work sphere will be very rewarding for you in July, with long-term endeavors coming to fantastic fruition and a plethora of potential projects knocking down your door. The stars are on your side right now, but don’t let that make you foolhardy and take on an unmanageable workload. Mark our words: if you ignore this advice, you’ll soon end up having to sell off your Calder, Wyeth, and Homer — or the equivalent among your possessions — just to pay the bills.
Leo (July 23–August 22)
Oh, Leo, we’d love to pretend that all you need to worry about right now is the professional front and just tell you to be very detail-oriented at work, like a studio assistant for Mickalene Thomas carefully applying thousands upon thousands of rhinestones to huge paintings of reclining women, but you’ve got bigger problems. Your love life is about to implode, so consider this an all-hands-on-deck period on the romantic front. If you want your current relationship to make it to August — which, maybe you don’t? — counter angry attacks and hurtful comments with sweet, soft, and comforting kindness. Make yourself more like one of Thomas’s installations, all gaudily upholstered furniture, shaggy carpets, fake wood paneling, and other homey comforts.
Virgo (August 23–September 23)
If you have opportunities to travel for work this month, Virgo, we strongly urge you to take them all — and, if not, create them! A pastoral residency would be ideal, or a far-flung art fair (Art Southampton or Art Market Hamptons would be good, the Seattle Art Fair would be better, unless you live in Seattle). Really anything to get you away from the people who ostensibly love you, because they will make your July miserable.
If you’re currently seeing someone, try to see as little of her or him as possible because that person will be maddeningly wrong and mean all month long. He or she will say crazy things, like that the Museum of Modern Art’s Björk exhibition was fantastic, and all you’ll be able to do is grit your teeth and nod. Spare yourself the pain; go find a hidden place.
Libra (September 24–October 23)
We have a very clear message to relay to you this month, Libra: work hard and play hard. On the professional front, you stand to start some very meaningful partnerships that will blossom into major projects on an unprecedented scale in early 2016. As for your social prospects, your influence among friends and lovers is at its peak, making this the perfect time to plan a romantic weekend getaway or a road trip with your besties. What the stars are tying to say, but can’t because they never studied art history, is that right now you are basically Caravaggio — the most powerful patrons are throwing money at you, and your friends would kill for you. Just, please, don’t go completely Caravaggio and actually kill someone; favorable planetary alignments can’t do much for murder.
Scorpio (October 24–November 22)
This is going to sound oddly specific Scorpio, but, well, the stars don’t lie: you should not be sleeping more than five hours per night this month. Now we know you’re no Tilda Swinton, stopping for a nap in whichever gallery you please at all times of day, but those 19 waking hours will be badly needed as you push a major project to completion this month, all the while requiring maximum patience and poise to make the right decisions in your personal relationships. Work fast, make life choices slowly, and you’ll have no regrets keeping you up at night in August.
Sagittarius (November 23–December 21)
Did you catch the New Museum’s Chris Burden retrospective, Extreme Measures? It didn’t do much for us. Under all their bigness, shininess, and complexity, his sculptures and installations felt impersonal and underwhelming. But there was one of those later pieces that stuck with us, a fort-like structure built from bags of cement and titled “Beehive Bunker” (2006). Its massiveness actually seemed to mean something and its presence in the gallery was ominous. This month, Sagittarius, we suggest you build a bunker of your own — metaphorically, psychologically, and possibly also literally — because you will be attacked relentlessly by your peers and rivals.
Capricorn (December 22–January 20)
Some of the most impressive sculptures we discovered last month during Bushwick Open Studios were the works of Christopher S. Marshall, who told us that after studying painting and spending years working as a painter, he had become frustrated with the medium’s history and the innumerable prohibitions he’d internalized while in school, and that switching to sculpture had allowed him to work in a more intuitive and uninhibited manner. Well, Capricorn, consider this your time to follow Marshall’s lead and experiment with new subjects, styles, and materials. And, as a bonus, the formal and intellectual challenges that await in the studio will also help to distract you from how your increasingly dismal love life — it’s a win-win!
Aquarius (January 21–February 19)
Listen up, Aquarius, because one of your closest friends is on the verge of committing career suicide and you have the power to save her or him. We’re not sure how exactly — the stars offer clues, but they are not spy satellites — just know that it will be something on the scale of Jeff Koons’s Made in Heaven series or Damien Hirst’s wannabe Francis Bacon paintings, without the art-market-darling security net. Be the voice of reason. Or maybe, just maybe, you see this “friend” as more of a competitor than a friend, and you stand to benefit from her or his sudden fall from grace. If that is the case, you didn’t hear it from us, but the Made in Heaven series is actually really underrated.
Pisces (February 20–March 20)
You’re taking risks in the studio and trying new things, Pisces, and no matter what your detractors may tell you this month, the astrological forecast is unequivocal on this matter: you are on the right track. So pay no mind to what the critics are saying and just remember the lesson of Jacques-Louis David’s “Napoleon Crossing the Alps” (1801):
Aries (March 21–April 20)
This is one of those months, Aries, when something very serious is going on in your professional life while your romantic life rolls merrily along. You’ll need to make a difficult choice between a number of appealing career tracks with long-term implications — have your preferred media and materials become too safe and familiar, would now be a good time to switch galleries, is it really worth it to keep hustling just to stay in New York? Big, scary choices, but July is the time to decide. And, luckily, it’s also the time for you to take weekend road trips. Nothing soothes the stresses of making life-altering decisions like a visit to Dia:Beacon.
Taurus (April 21–May 21)
This is the type of astrological advice we just love to give: the stars say this is a perfect time to act on a longstanding romantic or sexual fantasy, horny Taurus. Did Nancy Grossman‘s masks spark an interest in bondage? Time to hit up your local leather shop! Does Yoko Ono’s “Cut Piece” give you chills? Maybe some S&M role-play is in order. Whatever it is, choose your partner(s) wisely, because there is a catch to this month’s sex-positive prognosis: someone very close to you has become an increasingly negative influence, and now is the time to cut her or him from your inner circle.
Gemini (May 22–June 21)
Did you see Raqib Shaw’s most recent show at Pace? His newest paintings are like Where’s Waldo? scenes where every character is a murderous mythological creature either spilling its enemies guts or having its own entrails violently extracted — and, in some cases, both at once. The works’ polychromatic tackiness and high-production-value execution are at odds with their insanely vicious details. Well guess what, Gemini? This month your life will frequently resemble one of Shaw’s compositions, with little acts of cruelty and anger awaiting you at every turn. But don’t worry, don’t take it personal, and play the long game; like Shaw’s paintings, these attacks will have no lasting impact.
