Hunter Biden selling NFTs on the Venice Beach boardwalk in Los Angeles (graphic by Valentina Di Liscia/Hyperallergic)

In what is being characterized as a bid “to raise funds for a new laptop,” Robert “Hunter” Biden was reportedly spotted attempting to sell NFTs on the Venice Beach boardwalk in Los Angeles. The son of sitting President Joe Biden was shirtless, making him easy to identify due to his distinctive back tattoo.

“It’s good shit, at a fair price,” said Biden, referring to a blanket set up on the boardwalk. Arranged on the blanket were several SpongeBob Squarepants memes, printed on paper earlier in the day at a local FedEx Kinko’s. When asked to define what an NFT is, Biden gnashed his veneers for a few minutes, before stressing his record of honest business dealings and clarifying that the real NFTs were “in the cloud,” while gesturing vaguely at the clouds overhead.

It was unclear whether Biden had a permit to sell on Venice Beach, but he indicated a willingness to accept alternative forms of currency, including bitcoin, or a seat on the board of a foreign energy company.

In many ways, NFTs represent a great opportunity for the disgraced politician’s son, whose business dealings have been a source of controversy for the better part of a decade. Much like Hunter Biden, NFTs have a rabid cohort of people obsessed with them, despite the fact that they are basically stupid, lack general meaning, and are a hapless product of late-stage capitalism at its worst. Biden claims he is considering endorsement deals to expand his business, but the offers made to him by “big NFT” require him to wear a shirt (and pants), so he has thus far declined.

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Sarah Rose Sharp

Sarah Rose Sharp is a Detroit-based writer, activist, and multimedia artist. She has shown work in New York, Seattle, Columbus and Toledo, OH, and Detroit —...