Louis Vuitton’s ArtyCapucines collection (image courtesy of Louis Vuitton, © Studio Lenthal)

At the end of the day, we all want the same thing in life: the freedom to spend an inordinate amount of money on an exclusive designer purse. Well, we can thank our lucky stars because premier purveyor of aspirational life accessories, Louis Vuitton, has embarked on a fruitful collaboration with sculptor Urs Fischer, offering fans of the classic LV Capucines BB bag the chance to spend even more money on it. Fischer is one of six contemporary artists to accept the invitation to redesign the bag under the moniker ArtyCapucines. Among the other artist creations, Alex Israel debuted his colorful edition of 300 wave-adorned Capucines, subtly signed with a custom enamel zipper pull on the bag’s interior pocket. It’s this summer’s must-have bag for all destinations, particularly privately owned islands, one imagines.

By contrast, Fischer’s ArtyCapucine is a traditional version of the bag in white, but he’s added a hyperrealistic wax-modeled sculpture of produce on a chain. The sculpture comes in six varieties: an egg, a green apple, a banana, a mushroom, a carrot, and a strawberry. These pieces, referred to in Vouge by the artist as “suspended sculptures,” can be attached to various contact points on the purse by achingly delicate gold-plated brass chains. As a lady on the go, I can tell you there are two things I desire in a purse: the instant assertion of wealth and status, and the likelihood that it will catch on something and break, scattering exclusive, hand-crafted art pieces as I navigate basic tasks in crowded metropolitan areas.

Like the Israel collaborative edition in the ArtyCapucines series, this collaboration with Fischer is issued in a run of 300, and at $8,600, while supplies last. It’s a great way to let people know you’re an enthusiast of art as well as fashion — and of course, wretched excess. For those who are already salivating for the next hot thing, the Fall/Winter 2019 collab features the textile stylings of Jonas Wood and boasts a textured finish created by an embroidery overlay of 200,000 stitches, certainly none of which will ever snag on anything, leaving your limited edition purse looking raggedy. As usual, Louis Vuitton manages to expand its niche as atelier to people rich enough to afford Popemobile-like protection from the world, ensuring that nothing and no one ever touches their valuable, valuable stuff.

Sarah Rose Sharp is a Detroit-based writer, activist, and multimedia artist. She has shown work in New York, Seattle, Columbus and Toledo, OH, and Detroit —...